


Anti-Aging Cream

by Desolate_Smog



Series: small fics for the soul (writer's month 2020) [12]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Gen, Kid Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Parental Deceit | Janus Sanders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:20:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25988866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Desolate_Smog/pseuds/Desolate_Smog
Summary: Roman made a dumb mistake. Janus doesn't want to deal with it but he will, because he's aresponsible adult.Writer's Month 2020, Day 19 - deaging
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders
Series: small fics for the soul (writer's month 2020) [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1859371
Comments: 4
Kudos: 82
Collections: Writer's Month 2020





	Anti-Aging Cream

Janus paused as all his self-preservation instincts flared up. He looked to the side, where Remus was having a riveting discussion about rigor mortis with Logan. That left Patton, Roman, Virgil, or Thomas himself as the cause. Any other sides were too well taken care of to be causing any problems. 

Janus stood up slowly, taking the time to stretch and check Patton in the kitchen as he did so. Nothing concerning. 

He tugged at his capelet and waved to Remus and Logan as he made his way upstairs. "Don't have too much fun without me." 

"I always do JJ!" Remus shouted behind him. 

Now, the question was whether it was Roman, Virgil, or Thomas. Roman was next on his mental list, so on his next step he sunk out and stepped up in Roman's room. 

"Roman?" He called out, "It would really make my day if you were dying in here." 

The expected offended noises didn't come. 

Janus hummed to himself neutrally and walked quickly toward the room that held the doorway to the imagination. His lack of trust in Roman's ability to look after himself caused him to check every room he passed, just in case. 

He'd barely finished checking the first room he came across when he heard the cry of a child. 

Janus abandoned his fruitless search and ran in the direction of the cry, only slowing down as he approached the room. He gathered up a calm façade and walked into the room. 

Despite the crying clearly having been that of a child, Janus hadn't expected the child to be sobbing in a pile of Roman's oversized clothes. 

_Danger_ , his instincts warned, as if the miniature version of Roman wasn't evidence enough. 

"Hello there," Janus said gently, approaching slowly and keeping his eyes peeled for danger. Roman's head snapped toward him, his cries growing louder as his tiny pudgy hands clenched at his sash. 

Janus cooed at the toddler, "It must be scary up here all alone," 

"Dee," Roman sobbed, suddenly throwing his hands out and grabbing at the air for Janus, "Dee, Dee, Dee, Deedeedee!" 

"It's okay, baby, we can fix this," Janus said, smoothing his voice out and adding a lyrical touch to it. He knelt down beside the toddler and easily caught Roman when he lunged for him. He rubbed circles in Roman's tiny back as he looked around for the cause of the toddler-ified side. 

His eyes caught on an open, knocked over tub. It reminded him of moisturiser, or some other similar beauty product. He walked over to it and crouched straight down, being careful not to jostle Roman. He set Roman on his legs and kept an arm around him as he picked up the container. 

_Deaging Cream_ , the container read. 

"Roman." Janus sighed, closing his eyes and wishing the others weren't so prone to stupid accidents. "If you were trying to get rid of _wrinkles_ the product you were looking for is _anti-aging cream_." 

Toddler Roman didn't seem to have the same mental capacities as regular Roman, as the child was now resting on his shoulder, worn out from all the emotions earlier. Roman looked up at him and tugged one of his hands at Janus' capelet through his oversized shirt. 

"Hmm?" Janus tilted his head at him, rolling a sleeve up so Roman could use his hand properly. "Are you remorseful?" 

"Dee, no." Roman muttered, hiding his face in Janus' shoulder and squirming away from Janus' attempts at fixing his clothes. 

"Pity." Janus said. He wondered at Roman's vocabulary, and decided that Roman was around the age of one to one and a half. Potentially very few words, mostly the names of family members and not much else. 

"No." Roman said again. 

Janus considered taking the baby to Patton to take care of, but then he reminded himself that he still hadn't checked on Virgil. It was more than likely that Virgil was fine, but Janus had no trust left. Roman had turned himself into a baby for crying out loud.

"Do you want to go see Virgil, Roman?" 

"No," Roman said, but he lifted his head up and tapped his hand against Janus' face excitedly. 

"You mean yes." Janus smiled, poking Roman on the nose. 

Roman giggled. "No! Dee!"

Roman reached up and made grabby hands at Janus' hat, which Janus chuckled at. "You never stop trying to steal my hat, menace." 

Janus picked up the cream and stood up, walking over to Roman's desk and putting the cream down.

"Dee!" Roman complained. "Dee!" 

"So bossy," Janus said, taking his hat off and putting it on the baby. 

Roman cooed and pulled it off his head, immediately sticking the brim in his mouth. 

"That was my favourite hat." Janus lied solemnly. 

Roman grinned at him with his gums. 

Janus remembered when Roman and Remus were originally this age. This was before the split, but they had acted much like Roman was now, clingy, loud, and obsessed with his hat. Janus had had more to do with the creative process then, creativity and lies being closely linked before the twins had developed personalities. He had almost missed being around little kids.

Roman's spit started dripping off the hat and onto his clothes. 

"Gross." He told the child. On second thought, maybe he didn't miss children at all. 

Janus didn't bother with walking to Virgil's rooms and sunk straight into them. Roman whimpered, but his occupation with the hat stopped him from crying, much to Janus' relief. 

"Virgil? Hibernating for the winter?" He called, pushing at the sleeve Roman hadn't let him fix.

"Etty!" Roman called, pulling away from the hat. Janus grimaced at the spit string. 

"What the hell is that." Virgil asked, appearing from the shadows unharmed, but very suspicious and unnerved. 

"Roman." Janus answered, shifting said baby. Roman grinned at Virgil and stuck Janus' hat back in his mouth. "He's regressed. Showing his true colours." 

Virgil sneered uncomfortably at the baby. "Why." 

"The imagination, I'm assuming." 

"That's dumb." 

"Etty," Roman said, reaching out and trying to give Virgil Janus' hat. 

"Uhh," Virgil stalled. The hat fell from Roman's underdeveloped fine motor skills. 

Roman's mouth wobbled and he stared at the hat with wide distressed eyes. 

"UHH," Virgil said, more distressed this time. He bent down and grabbed the hat some place it wasn't wet. "Here, here's your drool hat, don't cry," 

Roman sniffled and hid his face in Janus' shoulder. 

"Etty," Roman said, the sound muffled. "Dee, Etty." 

"Aww," Janus crooned, grabbing his hat from Virgil. "Was big bad Anxiety mean to you?" 

Virgil glared at him, and Janus smiled smugly at him. 

"How about we go see Patton?" Janus said, petting Roman's hair. He didn't need to stay here and continue make things awkward now he knew Virgil was okay.

"Dadadadad!" Roman cheered, upset forgotten. Virgil sighed in relief.

"Say bye to Virgil, Roman," Janus prompted. 

Roman opened and closed his hand at Virgil with a grin. "Etty, Etty!" 

Virgil smiled slightly. "Bye Roman." 

Janus waved over his shoulder as he sunk out and appeared at the top of the stairs to the common area. He hoped that they would be less loud if he approached from the way he left. 

"Dad, dad, dad," Roman chanted at him, reaching for the hat. 

"Is that so?" Janus said, passing his hat over. "Do tell me more," 

"IS THAT A BABY." Remus shouted at him from the bottom of the stairs.

Janus sighed as Roman burst into tears, dropping the hat. 

"DEE YOU SEX MACHINE! I DIDN'T KNOW WE COULD HAVE BABIES!" 

"Janus?" Logan said, bewildered. 

"Baby?" Patton asked, jogging out of the kitchen. He gasped when he saw Janus soothing Roman. "Baby!" 

"It's Roman." Janus said, answering none of their questions. 

"ROMAN?" 

"Remus," Janus scolded with a glare and more hushing to Roman. 

"What do you mean that's Roman?" Patton asked, walking up the stairs and reaching out for the baby. 

Janus walked down to meet him halfway. "I went to check on him and found a baby instead." 

Janus tried to give Roman over to Patton, but he screamed. "DEE, DEE NO!" 

"Hey, shh," he said. "It's Patton. You know Patton," 

"Hey, Roman," Patton said softly. "It's daddy!" 

Roman's screaming stopped and he pouted pitifully at Patton, taking fistfuls of Janus' clothes. "No." 

"You wanna stay with Dee?" Patton asked. 

"No." Roman said, turning his head into Janus' shoulder to hide. 

Patton giggled. "Okay kiddo." 

"You said you found him like that?" Logan asked. 

"Yes," Janus said. "Alongside a tub of deaging cream." 

"That... isn't a thing." 

"Oh, I made it!" Remus boasted. "Babies everywhere! Can I have it DeeDee, I thought it only worked in the imagination!"

"No," the rest of them said. 

"Fun killers." 

"How do the people become adults again?" Patton asked.

"I don't care!" Remus spun around in a circle. 

"What if we wiped the cream off his face and hands?" Logan said, walking toward the kitchen as he said it.

Janus shrugged and finished walking down the stairs. 

"Mmm, Dee!" Roman squirmed, sucking on his fingers and tugging at Janus' hair.

"I know you like being clean, Roman." Janus said, pulling the tiny hands away. "Don't try convince me you want to be dirty." 

"Oh, here, kiddo!" Patton picked up Janus' hat and handed it to Roman. "You dropped this," 

Roman babbled incomprehensibly and stuck it in his mouth, content. 

"It's interesting," Logan said as he walked out of the kitchen with a wet tea towel. "He seems to recognise all of us, but he's never seen us at this age before." 

"The imagination doesn't have to make sense, Logan." Janus said. 

Logan sighed and handed off the towel to Patton, who cooed at Roman and started cleaning his hands with minor protests from the baby. 

"How old is he?" Logan asked. 

"About one, maybe a bit older." 

"Let's do your face, kiddo!" 

"He's been calling us by our functions," Janus said thoughtfully. "I wonder what that means." 

"All clean!" 

Roman sniffled at Patton and clamped down tighter on the hat. 

"You should put him down in case he starts to grow." Logan suggested.

Janus was happy to do so. "I'm off. Let me know how it goes. Remus," 

Remus grinned at him from behind Patton, having been watching his twin turned baby. 

"We're taking the cream back to the imagination." 

"Aww, that's lame." Remus complained. "How loud would RoRo scream if I broke his arm?" 

"Very." 

"Can I try?" 

"No!" Patton yelled, standing over Roman protectively.

"Maybe later," Janus said. 

"Janus!" Patton gasped, mortified. 

"Good luck." Janus said, grabbing Remus and sinking out. 

Really, the others were far more trouble than they were worth. 

"You worried about my brother J- _anus_?" 

"Not at all." 

Remus snickered. "Liar." 

Janus flipped him off.

**Author's Note:**

> Roman was a kid for the rest of the day and came back very embarrassed.  
> Janus got a surprise new hat the next day.


End file.
